Post Vasectomy Pain Forum

Anxiety, depression, ruined my life

Finding this forum was like a breath of fresh air. Nobody believes me when I tell them my story. Apparently it is all mental.

I had my vasectomy done in January 2015. Since then my life has been a living hell. Prior to the procedure I was fit, active, generally a positive person, and I felt like a man. Since, I deal with severe depression, panic attacks, ED, and my wife cheated on me. Everyday I feel more and more emasculated.

I noticed the problems immediately. When I went in for my follow up I told the doc I had not had an erection since the procedure and the sample was obtained partially limp. He told me it was mental and gave me trials of Viagra.

The Viagra would help me obtain an erection, but I would often lose it during intercourse. I went back for a follow up and he said I had blood in my urine and wanted to do a scope. I had the procedure done and the scope did not reveal any issues, nor did my follow up urine sample. I had lifted heavily prior to the initial urine sample and found later that could cause blood in the urine.

Another month went by and I went back and told him something wasn’t right. He did a testosterone test and my levels were at 190 so he started treatment for low T.

At this point, I had started experiencing severe bouts of depression and had my first panic attack. I had never had a panic attack in my life to that point. My depression was so bad that I went to my primary to discuss treatment options. This was about a month after starting treatment for Low T. My doctor ordered me to stop the treatment and put me on what was the first of many antidepressants.

From this point the slide began further. Many of the medications made my depression worse. My ED issues had prompted my wife to have an affair. Finding this out caused me to slide to the mental depths of hell. By this time I stopped working out and putting on weight. Since the procedure I have gained 60lbs.

It has been 4 1/2 years since the procedure and 3 1/2 since the affair. I found an antidepressant to help curb some of the severe bouts of depression, but it only somewhat helps.The panic attacks haven’t gone away nor had the ED. I have spent multiple hours in counseling and seen multiple doctors. Everyone keeps telling me it is mental.

My wife and I are still trying to pick up the pieces of our marriage. She finally told me that she cannot be with me at my current weight and general state of unhappiness. Fix it or else.

I don’t know what to do or where to turn. The only thing keeping me from ending it all is my kids. I couldn’t do that to them. Everday I feel more and more emasculated and exhausted with life.

Welcome to the forum bro. Your story sort of resembles mine, of course everyone is different but there are common points. Knowing my name here feel free to read my posts.

I think you are suffering from sexual dysfunction and lack of erection and low T are part of the symptom. There are other symptoms like mine, losing all sensitivity and no pleasure of sex especially during ejac, low pressure down there :point_down: etc etc. it’s horrible.

There are many posts that I found here that deal with similar issues to yours. This forum is great and has a lot of very scientific content.

One thing that I am finding that helps is working out the muscles around the area between the butt hole and scrotum. I think all vasectomized men see some prostate damage. In some I believe it is more severe causing several such complications. Lack of erection is related to the nervous system of the penis that emerges from the prostate area. Prostate dysfunction likely results in nerves in that region to be impacted, somewhat numbing those areas (some of these are my theories).

Good luck.

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Sorry to read your story.

Please do your homework on this and get opinions from many. Treat my story that follows as just one data point. I started massive pain 8 months after my vasectomy done in March 2005. In addition to pain, my T registered at 285-325, quite low for a 40 y/o healthy male. I had a reversal in June 2006 and watched my T level climb to 405 a year later and 650-750 in 2017-2018 despite now being 53-54.

I suffered a return of pain in 2016, but have been able to get rid of most of it through injections.

I suggest looking into reversing your vasectomy.

Welcome and as we jokingly say wish you weren’t here.

I can tell you that the mental part can be a big issue first hand. I cannot jack off period. I try and try, but I cannot maintain an erection lots of crap comes into my head and I just can’t do it. Totally at the mercy of my wife which sucks. Sex is a bit different, it’s a frustration of a different kind. But I just wanted to say is your mental state along with all these other factors can really complicate things like you wouldn’t believe (well now I guess you would :wink: ) Can you ball park what your age is for us?

I am 39, turn 40 in a month.

Thank you. I started reading the posts on here and felt compelled to respond. I have plead my case and was always told it’s mental and the Vasectomy wasn’t the problem, it was me. I had no idea other people were having the same issues.

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So you got it done at around 35? My advice with the wife and this is easier said than done, is to try to get her to understand see if she will read stuff on this forum, I myself have gain 25 pnds. I’m 5 9 pushing 202. Tell her you are the same person just encountering a big problem and you need her. She may be using the weight gain as an excuse. Is she a lot younger than you?

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She is the same age. I don’t think she cares about the ED issues. She told me to fix the depression and weight or else. I admit that I am not an easy person to live with at the moment.

That’s the insidious part of vasectomy. The medical community denies all the issues, sometimes even the pain. The FemiNazis make it sounds like vasectomy is a man’s duty. The only organizations on men’s side is this forum and the Roman Catholic Church (and it’s too busy cleaning up its own house to help us). Not quite a conspiracy against men, but the only real hope men have is finding this forum before getting snipped.

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Very well said!! I totally agree with you on both Fem and Church thing.

Thanks everyone for the comments. After reading through the forums today I am going to get my T levels checked first. Actually writing everything out in this post and reading it over in combination with reviewing these forums has helped me at least find a starting point…and given me a bit of hope.

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@JHAT - I feel for you, hang in there bro, things will get better, believe in it. I started to get better 2-3 years after vasectomy and now it is not bad, kind of. Going through divorce aftermath, pain, depression, anxiety, low T, sexual problems, … things are getting better. Be strong, there are options mentioned on this forum, and an ultimate option - reversal, if you decide to, I have not gotten to that point. I am taking papaya seed powder and I believe that it is helping me regarding epi congestion pain/burning and maybe it is also relieving some autoimmune issues. Start doing things, exercising, stretching, taking nice walks, whatever you like to do, it will make you feel better.

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Hey @jhat,

I’m glad you’ve found this forum useful but I’m sorry you have to go through this.

It’s more than a little infuriating that there is still ‘debate’ about PVPS.

Where do you live? Maybe we can help find you proper medical supports.

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Victor, you’re spot on, there’s no debate. Even the most conservative estimates of 1-2% mean that 5,000 - 10,000 men in the US are affected negatively by vasectomy EVERY YEAR. Let’s say half recover, but half linger. That’s 3,750 men per year being added to a pool permanently. Over 50 years since vasectomania began, that’s 150,000 - 200,000 American men walking around in pain just using their numbers and some simple math.

No way PVPS is a myth or “in anyone’s head.” Again, I fully concede the majority of men don’t incur the truckload that many here have, but to ignore well over 100,000 men is sinful.

Hey there I saw this post and just wanted to give you a little feedback from something I experienced. I’m NOT a doctor and don’t change your medication without consulting one! However, many antidepressants have serious sexual side effects and also result in weight gain.

For me, being on an anti depressant chemically castrated me and it took 6 months of being off it before I could have any interest in sex again. So you may find that your sexual problems and weight gain are only compounded with the anti depressants.

I have been through this myself, lost my relationship, lost my home, lost my job, ended up alone in a shitty apartment by the airport and unemployed as a result of trying to make a responsible decision to have a vasectomy. Fortunately I was able to have a surgery that has allowed me to live a normal life again even though I’ll never be pain free or 100% back to my old self.

Best of luck to you.

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Did you have a reversal mate
Vasectomy ruins a lot of men and their relationship
.they should be banned

No I did not have a reversal - I had a follow up surgery to remove the granulomas that had formed, scare tissue, and clips. I then also had the testicles sewn into place. All of this together has allowed me to function in society again though I don’t ever expect to be fully pain free.