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Sexual Side Effects


#125

Here is my story

I had a lef inguinal hernia surgery with mesh in December 2017. After the surgery everything was normal. 10 months after the surgery I experienced very strong pain in my groin before and during ejaculation. The strong pain disappeared after the ejaculation but the groin are become more sensitive and a burning and bruching sensetion remained 10 hour. The pain increased during coughing. There was a point just above the incision line, when I press there I feel a pian in my groin at the leg side. Also after ejaculation pain, I feel pain in my groin during farting (!!!).
Also I feel strange pain in my groin when I feel aurosal. Erection doesnt needed to feel pain. Thinking erotic things also make small pain in groin. It is very strange but I found a complaint in the internet mention about the same thing. As I understand, with the stimulation of the erotic zone in the brain, vas deference or creamaster muscle started to contraction.

No body in my country including big proffessors in the university hospital don’t know anthing about this subject. I searched sciencitific papers and I found the name of complication. It is dsyejaculation. Dr. R B. first defined it in 1992. He published a recent paper “Pathology of mesh and time”. There are also some more paper such as Dr Kehleets paper. They stated that, mesh stuck to spermatic cord and vas deference and during ejaculation vas deference spasm are disturbed by the mesh. It creates neuropatic pain in groin. Ilıoinguinal nerve close to the hernaia area is responsible for that. Dr. R B. said that with the presence of the mesh, the situation is irreversible. Papers mentions some individuals who cannot perform sex due to pain.
The papers offers removal of the mesh and transection of the ilioinguinal nerve. 11 months after the surgery, My mesh was removed. The surgery was very difficult. After the surgery, everything was perfect. My fucntion returned to normal. But during the 4 month time interval, after the second surgery, the groin pain started to come back slowly. First the groin started to hurt during coughing, a burning sensation started after the ejaculation and finally the dsyejaculation pain started in one intercourse. Also pain in left testicle started when I touch it. There is no anormal findings in ultrasound.
No body knows anything in here. Dr.’s said, nerve re-grow cannot take place in 4 mont. This is due to new scar tissue formation at the surgery site and spermatic cord again stucked. The other strange pains are also restarted. (same as before)
Dr. R B. suggest to remove the left Vas deference completelly. He propose that, if no sperm flows in the Vas Deference , then there is no pain. The pain is due to damaged vas deference. I dont understand, if vas deference is damaged, why it didnt create any pain during 4 month period.
From the papers, I also learned that, removal of Vas or vasoctomy also creates chronic pain. Also some individuals complain about orgasm loss after vasectomy. So removal of vas can create additional problems.

A urologist in my country offered to make spermatic cord denervation. Bu as I know, it is the procedure for chronic testicular pain. Can it help to reduce the dysejaclation pain ?
Also another doctor adviced to block the ilioinguinal nerve completelly.
I dont know what to do.
I ruined my sex life. I am depressed and also my wife . I ruined all my social life. No doctor in my country dont know anything about tis subject and also they dont want to deal with it. Because I have unsual case, chronic pain and the solution is not clear. They want to perform only standart patients. The first surgeon didnt mentioned possible complications. He said that hernia opertation is very simple and has no danger. But the literature is full with chronic pain cases.
The Doctors in my counry want to earn more money and they ignore patients future risks. After the complication, they just say “I am sorry for you”. At the end of this story I may lost my left testicle. Also I lost 1 year up to now. I am 45 years old and my sex drive was high.
I saw several people with inguinal hernia. They didnt get surgery and they live with it. My hernia was not so big. I was performing sport and surgeon said that if I sontinue sport activities, hernia create proble and it is better to put a mesh. Mesh is a foreign object and spermatic cord, veins, nerves, muscles creates a complex formation in inguinal region. Mans sex fuction ism highly depend on vas deference tube, creamaster muscle and testicle.
My economical loss is very hidh. Not the fees of the medical trreatments, loss of the business is huge.
Every attempt to fix the situation has another complications. My only pleasure and relaxing part of life is ruined.
That was my story.


#126

It did for me.You have 2 options.Be happy with shitty orgasms the rest of your life or take the chance and get it back again.It was a simple option for me.I could have a 1000 doctors tell me not to do it and I would have got the reversal anyway.For once in my life being stubborn and not listening to the experts really paid off.


#127

Hi Dr Dan, sorry you to have had this problem,
I had a vasectomy 26 years ago which changed everything, my penis has shrunk, right testicial has gone to 1/3 of the size it should be, I am no longer sexually active as I am not interested in sex any more, from my first orgasm after vasectomy, never had the same intense feeling as before, my GP said it was in my head and thought I needed anti depression meds. I have also had pain for 26 years, still get it now, although not as often, I did have an epididymectomy, on my right testicial supposed to help with pain, that was in 1996 hence why the testicial is shrinking. I would not recommend a vasectomy or tubal to anyone, I weakened and it has cost me dearly, I did not want it either I was pushed by my wife, its caused rows between us mate I could go on,


#128

Hi @Francis have you ever considered reversal at all? What kind of pains are you getting. Have a nice rest of the day


#129

Yes I am booked in to have a reversal in August. The pain that I get now in like a tightness. cramping type then it turns to a dull ache which can last a couple days. The pain does not drop me to the floor like it use to. The reason I did not have the reversal sooner was I could not afford it. They can only do the left side now mate and I am a little nervous


#130

Just found this amazing example of the kind of doublespeak that makes us all feel a little nuts when we deal with the doctors:

“If you’ve recently had a vasectomy and are experiencing problems with your sex life, don’t hesitate to contact your doctor. While it’s unlikely the vasectomy is the root of your sexual troubles, they could be an indication of a complication stemming from your operation.”

https://vasectomy-information.com/sex-drive-after-vasectomy/#The_false_connectionbetween_vasectomy_and_loss_of_sex_drive

ROTFLOL: It isn’t the root cause … but your problem may stem from it…

Well, yes. I’m willing to admit that sexual side effects are not caused by the subset of vasectomies that do not have any complications.

For those of us for whom sex feels like trying to run with a bruised foot, this is pretty rich.


#131

@dsyejaculation I have inguinal hernia, and been offered mesh repair. I’m reluctant to have it, but am in so much pain :frowning:


#132

Amazing doublespeak…unlikley the root but could be…stemming from your operation.

Sounds like the famous response to whether our former president was having an affair with an intern. It depends on the definition of “is”.


#133

@Ethan_Scruples, I’m not a big fan of the vasectomy-information.com website. There’s a ton of information to sift through, and/or things to consider on their website, but it does come off as very pro vasectomy to me.

Theres definitely information on that site that comes off as, and/or reads as fact, when it’s more like speculation, or they quote/site reference to best case scenarios regularly.

There’s many studies sited as reference on that site that give best case scenario. Seems they site a study regarding epididymectomy, and give 90%~ success rates with that procedure. For those of us in the know, that’s nonsense. I know of many studies that completely contradict many references sited on the website. The website certainly doesn’t cover things in a way you see on this site, or others.

Whatever the case, it’s an interesting website that’s loaded with just about anything, and everything anyone could think to ask, wonder, etc, but it’s definitely missing a lot of the more negative type stuff. Thus, it comes off as pro vas far as I’m concerned.

That website claims to be the most comprehensive, and complete database regarding vasectomy, but I’d have to totally disagree.

I’m not amused with the fact that the website comes off as the end all, be all factual vasectomy information website, but has a disclaimer that basically gives them a free pass far as indoctrinating the masses with all the supposed factual information therein, and they take absolutely no responsibility for what anyone takes from it as fact. Typical bs.

I wrote a bit regarding the website in the “thanks for the warnings everyone” thread. I even left them a comment in their risks section, and they surprisingly didnt flag it, and/or remove it. It’s still on there.

I’m curious to know who runs, and/or controls that website.


#134

There is a reddit user that pisses me off named Vas975. My guess is that they are a paid social media “opinion shaper” because whenever anyone complains about their vasectomy, Vas975 soon appears to apply some pretty skillful sophistry to deflect, minimize and sow doubt.

I don’t want to be a conspiracy nut going on and on about the lies “Big Vasectomy” pushes at every turn, but on the other hand, there is probably a lot of bang for the buck in social media propaganda if you happen to want to promote a cause. And we know there is a whole cottage industry developed to sell this as a turnkey product.


#135

Yea, I hear you brother. I’m sure I would take an immediate liking to Vas975. Could be a male, or a female for all we know.

For those who think some people here are to “conspiracy” about the risks, side effects, and warnings given beforehand, I’d suggest they read the definition of the term conspiracy.

The majority of people don’t even know the definition of conspiracy. Many think conspiracy theories are conspiracies, when the truth of the matter is, the term conspiracy theory defined are actually attempts to explain away a conspericy.

This isn’t the proper thread to get into all that, but I’d entertain anyone’s ideas as to why things are the way they are far as informed consent, etc, etc.

If people educate themselves, and look up the definition of conspiracy, that’s exactly what’s going on in the vast majority of cases.

I could go on, and attempt to make some point’s, but I don’t have a lot of interest in hashing out the conspiracies that surround vasectomy with anyone, especially in this thread. People either get it, or they don’t.


#136

So this is going to be long but I really need a place to get this off my chest and seek support for my husband if there is any at this point. Yes, my husband. I’m a wife. A wife who put her foot down and demanded her husband get snipped. Before you all come at me with your flames and pitchforks let me share my side of things.
So this doesn’t get too long I will spare you the painfully long details of my pregnancies and births. The short version is my first child came early and nearly died. NICU time and a later Autism diagnosis drained our bank account and destroyed us financially. Our second was an oops and it was a horrific pregnancy that I almost didn’t survive, to make a very long story short.
I’ve got my two beautiful children. It’s been wonderful.
But for sure we both knew I couldn’t handle another pregnancy. And we’re happy with our two. We’re done with kids. Sooo birth control right? Not for me. Because of a condition I have I had been on it for 10 years total and it wreaked havoc on my hormones, killing my own sex drive among other unpleasant side effects. My doctor wanted me off them for at least a few years if not forever so I could attempt to reverse the damage.

So in this very close knit mom’s group I’m in I had seen quite a few of them mention their husbands having vasectomies, so I asked them to be candid. What were the side effects, what were the risks, complaints from their guys afterwards. One after another after another went on and on about how easy recovery was for the most part, how it improved their sex life, no complaints from hubby, best decision ever made, etc etc. Great! So time to ask an actual trained medical professional. I scoured the internet looking for the best doctor in our network, spent days calling offices, searching reviews, Google searching “vasectomy side effects.” I found nothing about this. Nothing. I found what many of you say you were told. That sexual side effects are “impossible”. Impossible they all said… Now I’m not stupid and neither is my husband. You can’t alter your body and have 0 side effects. THAT’S impossible. But we both concluded after this internet research, talking to friends and men my husband knew who had it done and with not ONE of them complaining of sexual side effects we figured it must be pretty far fetched to face anything serious. He hesitated though and I said no. You need to get this done. We’ve turned over every stone (or so we thought at the time) and this is WAY easier for you than it is for me, pull out method resulted in 2 babies so you’re not putting your super swimmers anywhere near me anymore!

So I’ve poured through each and every comment on this thread and if you go all the way back to the original poster I think? Back in 2014, tlbtb, my husband is experiencing exactly that. Word for word. Let me tell you that pre-vas, he was a sexual God. I used to call his penis, porn star dick because it was. Very well endowed in that whole neighborhood. Could go with a massive raging erection anytime, night or day. I also consider myself pretty skilled in the bedroom and could get him off in minutes if that’s what he wanted. Post-vas, it’s like a switch was flipped. Huge loss of interest in sex in general, he doesn’t struggle to get hard but his erections are nothing compared to what they once were and he’s most definitely lost girth and testicular size. It is a serious struggle for him to have the weak and almost pointless orgasms he has. He doesn’t like to be touched in the same way anymore due to testicular pain and I’m thinking it’s worse than he’s letting on. Let’s just say I’ve spent a lot of time down on him and I’ve come to know his upper thighs pretty well. I know when he’s truly relaxed and when he’s tensing, when he’s about to orgasm etc just by how he tenses or relaxes his thighs and despite him saying he was enjoying it last night his thighs said otherwise. Does that make sense? He was so tense, he couldn’t relax them and keep twitching as if he were in pain. It took a very very long time to get him to orgasm like it usually does now.

Last night I typed in “loss of sensation after vasectomy” and BAM! Tons of stuff popped up, none of which came up in my “vasectomy side effects searches” I was furious and then completely heartbroken and devastated for my husband. In fact devastated is an incredible understatement. For those of you who have had unsupportive wives who haven’t cared about this nightmare you are living, I don’t know what kind of horrible *itches you married but I am truly truly sorry. I’m horrified at this situation I got my husband in to. Horrified. I’ll do whatever I can to cater to his new sexual needs, spend all the time in the world learning what feels good now, I’m desperately working my butt off to get as tight as possible, to try new things, whatever, but you all know that none of that will bring back what he was. He will never be the same and I am horribly ashamed and devastated. While I feel we were both terribly misinformed and I was fresh off of having irreversible things done to my own body for the sake of giving him children and living with the very realistic fear of those things happening again if we had another slip up, I should have respected his hesitation.
I very much wanted to get this all out here because I will NEVER EVER let on to him what I said above about loss of size etc. NEVER. He still pleases me. He certainly hasn’t lost his technique and his, well now forced ability to go on longer results in multiple orgasms for me, but the guilt I carry from knowing why that is is already effecting my ability to orgasm which if he even thinks for a moment I’m not orgasming from him he will be further destroyed and plummeted into terrible depression. I don’t know what to do. There’s nothing to do is there? But live with the guilt of my choices and do everything in my freaking power to make him feel like the sex God he once was.


Considering vasectomy
#137

@hlfl12, sorry to hear this story, and thanks for posting it. Story’s like yours are actually quite common.

Your husband certainly has options. You said you read every post in this thread, so I can assume you already know what they are. I hope you share them with him, and don’t withhold your knowledge learned here because you are worried about getting pregnant again. In hindsight, condoms would’ve been a better alternative than your husband’s current outcome. No man deserves to live out the rest of their life like that.

The OP of this thread took his chances on his options, and I don’t recall him ever saying he regretted his choices other than having the vasectomy in the first place.

BTW, how long ago was your husband’s vasectomy?


#138

He HATES condoms and almost always pressures me not to use them and in the throes of passion I have a hard time saying no to him. Not having to use condoms anymore was his biggest motivator. But I’m fairly certain he’d be more than happy to use them now if it meant getting back the feeling he had before. I will share what I’ve learned but it seems to be what he already knows. Reversal has considerable risks and isn’t a guarantee that feeling will return. Not only that, the likelihood that we could afford it anytime in the next few years is nil at best. He’s only 3 months out but the difference in him is so drastic and so night and day that I doubt time will do much. He’s been doing a lot of natural things to increase his testosterone. He’s never had his levels checked but it’s obvious there must have been a drop of some sort. We both are wanting to give that some time but just like he said it’s not even about being able to get it up it’s just that the feeling is gone. Like nerves are severed. How do you fix that? I’m searching now for someone to see about a reversal regardless of whether or not he intends to or we could afford it, I think we would just both like some confirmation from someone that this isn’t in his head as he was told initially.


#139

Also thank you for getting through that novel of a post and offering your advice.


#140

Giving it enough time is a wise move. How much time? That’s for you guys to decide, but waiting it out for at least a year is probably sound advice. It’s possible he may improve in time, and I know you are aware of that as you’ve read this entire thread.

How do you fix that? I know of many men that report better on failed reversals. I live day to day on a failed reversal, and I feel nowhere comparable to the disconnected vasectomized state I once did years ago. I’d tell anyone that my sensory nerves have grown back over time.

Yes, there is a risk of making things worse, and it’s said to be around a 1-2% chance for guys with pvp/s. Guys like your husband may be even less at risk, but I wouldn’t assume way to much. When in doubt, consult with a highly experienced, and highly respected reversal surgeon.

If your husband does ever decide to have a reversal, I wouldn’t count on it being a success far as fertility, or him remaining fertile. Obviously, there’s pros and cons to that to.

I appreciate your feedback. Keep us posted, and good luck.


#141

@hlfl12 thanks for your post. Even though the last 15 months have felt like a nightmare at times, I’m not totally against vasectomies any more than I’m against IUDs, tubal ligations, BC pills, etc. The thing that stands out about your story, and many others, is the fact that you were well aware of the risks of female contraception, but had no idea on post vasectomy complications. Based on your history, you all needed an effective form of birth control, but not all of the facts were presented, so you couldn’t make a true informed decision. If you had a strong discussion and knew the risks, at least you could have decided what is best for you as a couple. The choice very well could have been a vasectomy. I think it would be easier to accept complications knowing that they were a possibility.

There’s help out there that is covered by insurance, so talking to a PVPS expert is a good idea. Keep being supportive. My wife has been amazing and quite frankly, I don’t know where I would be without her at this point. Good luck


#142

I feel your pain, and I’m impressed by how candid you’re willing to be. I had asked several of the guys I knew about their vasectomies and didn’t get a single bad result. My doctor had done thousands without a complaint. My wife didn’t push me, we were just getting too old to handle an infant and I wanted to be done with all the other BC methods. One thing you alluded to was touching the boys and that was something I loved. At times I wanted them squeezed to just before the threshold of pain, and my wife got very good at knowing where that line was. Now, it doesn’t feel good and I wouldn’t risk blowing out my epididymides anyway. Everything that comes in contact with my testicles seems to cause me to ache for hours or days. I’m not as bad as I was, but I feel awfully fragile now.

I’m also having ED issues and I don’t know whether it’s the procedure or just my age, but I regret my decision every single day. I will look into a reversal when it’s something we can afford.


#143

That’s the word, fragile, that I use to describe my best days, even the 9 years between reversal and this bout of resurgent pain. Always tentative and in fear of something hitting the boys and turning the pain signal on.


#144

@tlbtb I had vasectomy more than a year ago and have very similar symptoms to you. I think I am fucked for the rest of my life unless reversal helps bring the feeling back. Yes I feel insensitive on the tip of the penis and sex is nowhere close to where it was before. The irony is the people whom I consulted previously who had done vasectomy never complained of this!! I think they may all have the issue but somehow don’t want to reveal this or maybe a psychological thing all together that they want to pretend they’re ok.

I regret having done vasectomy. The feeling of orgasm is nowhere close, and the major part is penile insensitivity. Be it hormonal or physical (maybe one needs some sperm mixed with ejaculate for the receptors in thenpenis to get activated??) i feel like shit.

By the way I am circumcised. I know circumcision already takes away 60-70 or more % sensitivity so I am guessing people who feel less insensitive are not circumcised. Good for you and I envy you who were not circumcised are intact.

In any case I am 46 years old and have sex 1-2 time a week with my wife. Orgasm feels aweful sometimes and sometimes it is slightly better but nowhere close to where it was in pre vasectomy.

Any solution will be appreciated.

Thanks!!!