No hijack, continue. I’m concerned about you.
My brothers wife was a very strong person. Very strong. She had some crazy health stuff too before she was diagnosed with cancer. She had what was believed to be Lyme’s disease and was going down to Florida to get these treatments from this “specialist”. I remember the entire thing seemed kid of hinky, why go all the way to Florida for Lymes treatments. She would take these drugs that would make her feel awful. I know she took Flagyl which I had to take, coincidentally right around the time all this other crazy stuff started happening with me. Flagyl makes you sick and feel like death. She also was getting rashes and feeling really sick and because my brother had a wet basement they believed it was due to toxic mold so they had to remediate that too. We think the focus on treatments for her rashes and Lyme malaise masked the cancer growing inside of her. That’s one thing with voluntarily doing something to your body that causes injury and chronic pain. You start trying to fix something that is not easily fixable and it makes it hard to listen to other things that might be going on with your body. Vasectomy is just a dumb thing to do to a healthy body.
I’m fine Scott, don’t worry about me.
Women do get messed up from tubal ligation too. If I had a time machine I would never have gotten a vasectomy but I never would have let my wife get her tubes tied either if I could have prevented it. She is one of these black and white “get er done” type of people so she probably would have done it and thrown it in my face anyway, lol.
@Scott_Teeters you have said everything that I have been thinking about it my mind, and what RingoStar and many others have said as well. Our bodies, men and woman, are not meant to be altered like this. I always try to think, without the vasectomy I would have another child and with the vasectomy no more children…I keep going back and forth on this thought. Sometimes I think that maybe I’ll reverse the vasectomy 10 years later at which time my wife could resume birth control pills for several years…but I have to think about this more carefully.
Hi, I am a 36 year old that has 3 kids and an amazing wife but I too have had complications with my vasectomy. Before hand I would get hard as rock although i did have a little issue with premature ejaculation at times. Probably cause my wife is smoking hot and I get overly excited. Since my surgery over a year ago I have had seriously concerning issues such as pain in the right testcile. Constant throbbing pain some days and other days it hurts very much to touch as I found a lump in the testes that showed up after surgery. It should be mentioned my uro put the forceps on so tight that after I left over the next few days the skin dies where I was pinched off and an open sore appeared from the skin dying. This was painful and got infected. The open sore took over 3 weeks to heal and now I have pain. I also noticed the same as you guys my penis when soft and hard now appears smaller than before and definitely less full erections. Sometimes very difficult to achieve a erection I would call full. I also have the same loss of sensation as sometime masturbation can feel better than sex which is affecting my confidence in a big way. I was never a “big” guy down there, rather very average but I had hard and satisfying erections. I don’t know what to do as I’ve read hundreds of comments and I know when I consult a doctor about this they will tell me it’s not possible even though its definitely happening. What am I to do? I am truly scared that if it gets worse then its the end of my sex life and being a very sexual person I don’t think i can handle anything worse than this.
Amen on how this is an unnatural thing and wrong for men and women to do to a healthy body. I have felt “wrong” since I did it. I remember having sex with my wife on a cruise in April after my vasectomy in December and things just felt off.
36male_canadian , get a reversal.End of story.
36male_canadian, I too do not get as hard as pre-vasectomy and after the vasectomy I get excessive pre-ejaculate fluid. As I said before in these forums, orgasms are not the same nor will they ever be. I am 37 and it has been about 5 months since the vasectomy. I am contemplating a reversal.
Yes, i also have fair few of things you describe , complete lack of sympathy off wife is a massive impact on our relationship. I would leave ger if i dudnt live my kids so much - ironuc reakky as if i didnt have kids i wouldnt of dine this too myself.
Live and kearn i suppose,
I luckily font get much pain ( had thr fatal operation about 18months ago now). I think it reduces testosterone also - read symptons of defficiency in it, exercise does help.
I do find also if i dont ejaculate for a few days i get a pain in groin area. But sadly no powerful orgasms i used to have.
I worry it will get worse as the years progress but time will tell.
Also iwas pressured into it by wife, a source of resentment i can asdure you- im also so f&@£& angry i agreed to do this to myself.
Well more to life u sex i guess but yeah miss them powerful orgasms.
Yes on reflection my mother is a bit @crazy” she had that done to her when she was about 35 at a guess —— i dont r member my parents getting in and i have a feeling this had a part in it… i think the resentment factor can be powerful.
It’s unbelievable the number of men who were told this 1% bs.
Mine told me he had over 30 years of experience with vas and never had any problems.
I don’t know anybody in any profession who can say they only had problems with about 1% of their activities. Or who never made a single mistake in 30 years.
No matter how experienced you are, nothing is one-size-fits-all! Especially a surgery whose single purpose is rendering a perfectly functioning organ useless.
But we’re no doctors! Who are we suppose to believe?
All this reasoning goes down the gutter when a man in white tells you there’s nothing to worry about. Add some friends who did it and withheld the truth from you and you have the perfect formula to become another member of this forum.
Finding this forum is so helpful. I had a vas about 2 years ago, and the quality of my orgasm is so poor that I basically don’t want sex, nor do I masturbate as often. Since having the vas, all I feel during an orgasm is that I’m ejaculating. Literally all of the “punch” of an orgasm coming from prostate or balls is gone.
I’ve read through this forum and have just one question - will a reversal bring the pleasure back? Even if it was 50/50 chance of getting it back, I’d probably do it - that’s how bad it is.
I fought my wife for years on getting one as I was adament that having unnecessary surgery to change a healthy organ was simply not smart. She withheld sex, and forced me to go to a therapist with her, where they both teamed up on me to have the procedure. Now I’m just angry, resentful, and depressed.
I’m right there with you. On top of the reduced orgasm, I have on and off dull ache throughout the day. Sounds like some guys who’ve had reversal state that orgasm quality came back and some others say it didn’t help. Tough to come up with a % odds on that one.
I’m leaning towards a reversal. At 6 months post vas right now and will prob wait till around the 1 year mark. In the meantime, I’ll be doing more research and start some consults. Tough to believe any of what you hear from doctors though after this experience.
@helpfulforum, Assuming you’ve read the majority of this entire thread, your definitely not alone. I don’t know the % of men that end up with an outcome like yours, but I’m guessing it’s quite high. I’ve read countless stories like yours, and it happened to me as well.
I’d give you at least a 50/50 far as that reversal helping matters goes. You really only have two options here. Continue to wait it out indefinitely, and see if things improve in time, or have a vasectomy reversal.
I only recommend a vas to vas reversals/repairs. I never recommend vas to epi reversals. That’s another long topic, but you can take my advice to the bank.
I wouldn’t recommend getting all hung up on the idea that reversals, and long term patency go hand in hand because that’s another crap shoot of its own. Even if your reversal fails, you won’t feel “disconnected” anymore.
If you are going to have a vasectomy reversal, get the best possible surgeon to do it. Do not get caught up in the idea that “the surgeon is to far away”, “it costs to much”, or anything of the sorts.
There is a such thing as redo reversals, re-redo reversals, and so on, but in the majority of cases, we are talking about men who seek fertility to have another child, and generally speaking, these guys have their wife’s steering them into these procedures as well.
You do not want to have a redo reversal. The chances of success, and long term patency go down every time a reversal is redone. If your going to have a reversal, get it right the first time. Looking back, and having more regrets regarding bad choices is not recommended.
Far as your wife and her therapist go, that’s a really bad deal brother. As you already know, getting manipulated into having a vasectomy, and getting a negative outcome brings a whole lot of bad dialog, big problems, resentments, hard feelings, etc, etc into your relationship that are nearly irreparable. Who would’ve known?
People like obgyn’s, therapists, mother-in-law’s, MD’s, etc, etc have no business getting their mouths, and thoughts involved in such decisions. They don’t have to live with it, and generally speaking, they have absolutely no idea whatsoever what they are even talking about far as risks, side effects, and outcomes go.
Sorry you are here, and welcome to the club. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.
P.S., please refer to several “reversal” threads on here to get a better idea of all the risks, and things to consider far as that reversal goes. Nothing is risk free, and the risk of pvp/s, chronic pain, etc is very real.
I can’t thank you enough for your words of support. I’m on it. I will absolutely keep this forum up to date. Tears of joy!
Not a problem brother. Let me know if I can be of any more help to you far as questions go.
One last thing here, please understand that all vas to vas reversals are not done the same way. You can read quite a bit about this in numerous reversal threads as well.
If you get a reversal and get better dump your wife. That is unforgivable. I would tell that couselor off too. Seriously dude, withholding sex to force a man to get a surgery he doesn’t want to get… that’s abuse.
Imagine if the tables were turned and it was a husband witholding sex until his wife got a tubal!
Everyone would probably say he’s an abusive POS monster.
It would be reputation ruining.
Totally understand man. I know it will be hard to hear but are you in any pain outside of the emotional pain?
Getting a reversal for most on here has brought back sensation.
But you do risk of being in chronic pain afterwards. I’ve myself have lost that boost as well I’d say my orgasm has only about 75% what it once was. I’ve been able to fill the void by over stimulating other parts of the act more foreplay indulging in just more, more visual stimulation etc.
Some may disagree with me but if you have no chronic pain or issues, I would not risk surgery again. I would focus on improving on what you do have?? Again just my perspective IF you have no pain.
Backintime30, your advice is well received and much appreciated. That’s exactly the kind of feedback/education I need to understand. (What a shame, we have to talk amongst ourselves on a forum, rather all having the ability to get actual well balanced, medical history from, you know, a frigging SCIENCE driven, fact based, group of DOCTORS! How can it be that there aren’t at least 4-5 smart Urologists who have undergone a Vas, and are in our world of pain, and working with guys like us???
Can I ask, what the % increase was from prior to reversal, to 75%?