Hi, @earthenjar. I haven’t been on this forum in a while and I owe everyone an update in my thread, but your ED post caught my eye and I thought I’d respond and try to help. I read your other posts to catch up - you had your vasectomy around the same time I did. However, I never got a reversal so we’re kind of in different boats.
I’ve certainly encountered serious sexual issues but this has improved and I’ve learned to live rather happily with the differences (reduced penis sensitivity and orgasm) post-vasectomy. I’m nervous about a potential complete collapse down the road, but for now I’m continuing to have essentially the best sex of my life. This is important because I’d thought on multiple previous occasions that my sex life was completely done for.
Remaining positive and having as much fun with sex with your wife as you can I think are two very important things. My situation is somewhat unique because I’ve had some rather unstable relationships since my vasectomy (divorce, and now my follow-up longterm relationship is under serious stress - completely unrelated to sex - it’s arguably the greatest thing about our relationship), but I’m pretty obsessed with my partner sexually. I’m unbelievably attracted to her and we are great at talking about sex, trying to new things, and, uh, having sex. This kind of openess has helped me drastically. Cialis helped me get my confidence back. I would not be scared to talk with your doctor and try an ED drug in your situation; I think you are about a year younger than I am and maybe there’s some hesitancy because of that, but it may help. I think it’s important to note that I only use Cialis occasionally now - I no longer need it. This is probably TMI but I guess I mostly use it now to enable myself to have sex multiple times in a shorter period of time.
When you mention not getting morning wood, that makes me think there can be ‘phases’ to all of this. Like… and this is the most unscientific prediction ever… but I bet that’s gonna come back for you soon. You also talk about requiring a lot of manual stimulation. I feel like I used to back when I was really struggling but because I’m at my mental sexual best (gosh, that sounds stupid) it’s helped me? I’m doing a lot of rambling, sorry.
I’m painting a rosy picture but things aren’t perfect… but they have definitely come a very long way from where they were. You mentioned being extremely depressed in your previous post and I was, too, but I sure am glad I didn’t do anything drastic/terrible during that time because I had those thoughts.
PS - Don’t feel like a wuss. Your wife no doubt understands what you’re going through. I’m sure she doesn’t think you’re a wuss.